The Revelation AU – Part 13

Summary: Liam’s turned up on her doorstep but is Elizabeth ready to face the past?

Elizabeth stood shell shocked in the open doorway of her brother’s apartment, unable to move as she openly gaped at the person on the other side of the threshold.

‘Umm.. Elizabeth?’ Liam, the King of Cordonia stood before her, his tall form filling up most of the doorway as he stared down at her. ‘Is…Have I come at a bad time..?’

The hesitancy and concern in his voice as his blue eyes travelled up her dishevelled form was enough to snap her out of her trance.

‘No, no, nonsense. Its fine!’ she burst out nervously, frantically trying to smoothen down her hair as she stepped aside. ‘Come in, please!’

She hurriedly ushered him in, sneaking a glance in the mirror and hurriedly trying to pull herself together, catching sight of herself in the hallway mirror and rubbing at the faint mascara tracks staining her cheeks.

‘Tea?’ Elizabeth asked, painfully aware that her voice was too loud and squeaky.

Liam had barely nodded when she swept into the kitchen, eager to put some distance between the. She’d been knocked completely off kilter by his sudden appearance and, sneaking a glance at his tall figure as he perused her brother’s book collection, wracked her brain as to what could have possessed him to turn up so unexpectedly.

After putting the kettle on, she hesitantly took a seat on the armchair opposite Liam. Elizabeth took a moment to really take him in. The king, the man who was the real reason she ever left New York in the first place. Liam could make any outfit look good, currently a simple polo and jeans, she’d never seen him so casual and decided she liked this look on him. Seated on Theo’s beat up recliner, he retained a dignified but relaxed pose, completely different to herself, perched on the edge of her chair, ready to take flight at the smallest of scares. His blonde hair weaved with threads of gold that caught on the light from the setting sun filtering through the living room window, like a lionhearted angel. His lips curved up in the tiniest smile as he let her take him in for a long moment.

‘So…,’ Elizabeth began awkwardly, realizing she’d been staring too long. ‘How’s Cordonia and the uh… kingly… stuff?’

‘Cordonia’s good,’ Liam replied casually and if he felt the tension between them, he did not show it. ’Things are settling down after Anton’s capture and we’re finally getting back on our feet.’

’That… that’s good to hear,’ she said, surprised to find herself actually meaning it. There was a long pause during which she fought to keep her eyes trained on her chipped nail polish of her bare toes before finally finding her voice again. When she spoke, her tone was soft almost as if she was holding broken glass.

‘Have you come to bring me back?’

Liam’s eyes softened. ‘Elizabeth… you know I wouldn’t make you do anything you didn’t want to.’

The words struck a chord in her, especially after with the memory Robbie and what he’d almost done. Her eyes reflexively began to fill with tears and she sniffed loudly, feeling embarrassed at her stupid face for giving everything away.

Liam must have picked up on the sudden change as his brows furrowed and he began to speak. ‘Elizabeth… did something ha-.’

He was cut off by the loud whistling of the water boiling and she shot to her feet, almost too fast and sped into the kitchen, glad for the distraction. Her hands quivered a little as she prepared the beverage and she squeezed her eyes shut, willing herself not to cry.

By the time, the tea was ready, her hands had stopped shaking enough to hand Liam the teacup without spilling it. As Elizabeth watched him take an appreciative sip, her mind raced. Her memories had reappeared in fragments over the last few weeks and she’d pushed them out of her mind, resigning herself to the fact that she was her old life and this was her new one, trying to convince herself that it was well in the past. She would have probably succeeded too if Liam hadn’t appeared on her doorstep like he did. Now that he was standing here, everything suddenly seemed so real, like his very presence was a slap in the face with the past.

‘So you-‘ ‘

I gu-‘

They both started to talk at the same time and cut themselves off, laughing awkwardly.

‘You first,’ Liam insisted and Elizabeth gulped, prepared herself to ask him… Wait what was she going to ask him? They were interrupted yet again but the slam of the front door and her brother Theo entering the living room. He stopped short when he spotted Liam, who rose to his feet and stuck out his hand in a gesture of friendship.

‘You must be Theodore, Elizabeth’s older brother. I’m Liam.‘

‘Yeah I know who you are,’ her brother replied icily, not moving to shake his hand, casting a questioning look at her.

‘Theo its fine,’ Elizabeth placated. ‘He’s just here to talk.’

He gave her a doubtful look but eventually conceded, casting Liam a suspicious glare. ‘I’ll be in my room Aish if you need me.’

’Sorry about that,’ she began.

’No its fine really,’ Liam put in. ‘He seems nice and I’m sure-‘

‘Liam why are you here?’ Elizabeth burst out, unable to contain herself. ‘Really? If its not to come take me back, what made you come here? I’m sure you wouldn’t put off running a country just to see how I was doing…’

He ran a hand through his light hair, searching for the words. ‘You’re right…  Cordonia’s not the same. None of our friends are the same and… ’ His blue eyes bored into hers. ‘I know I said I wouldn’t force you to come back but… We…I miss you Liz.’

‘Liam… I…’ Elizabeth was lost for words, even more confused than ever. This was the first time she could remember him ever calling her Liz.. Her nickname sounded different, almost intimate when he said it and she… didn’t know what to do with that feeling. ‘What I did Liam… that kiss… I was very confused… and its hardly the right time.. I don’t.. I don’t know if I can give you what you’re asking…’

‘I know. I just hoped… ,’ he hung his head, letting the silence stretch for a few moments before interrupting what a humourless chuckle. ‘You’d think I’d have learnt from the first time right..?’

‘Liam…’ Elizabeth sank to her knees before him, lacing a hand through his, attempting to do… what exactly? ‘I mean I could try… You could train me..and-and…’ And what? Her voice wobbled with uncertainty and Liam immediately picked up on this.

‘No Elizabeth…,’ he waved her off, the sadness in his voice cut her to the core. ‘I couldn’t ask you to do that… It wouldn’t be right for me to… to take advantage of you in your current frame of mind. The crown and I are one, marrying me comes at a cost. You’d never get just me.’

‘Liam I’m sorry,’ she reached a hand up to touch his face, knowing in her heart this was for the best.

That didn’t make it didn’t hurt any less. Liam’s eyes told her he felt the same too. This feeling right now, this pain in her chest hurt was different to than anything she’d ever experienced. To have to turn down this amazing man, a king… for the second time.. Cruelty wouldn’t even begin to cover it.

‘I wish…’

‘Me too,’ he admitted, covering her hand with his. ‘Elizabeth…. If it were not for the mantle of king on my shoulders-’

‘No,’ she returned, renewed fervour in her voice. ‘You’re a great king and you’re going to do fantastic things in your reign. You deserve someone who understands you and can appreciate you for the amazing man you are… I promise when you meet her, she’s going to show you why it never was going to be me anyway.’

They exchanged sad watery smiles before Elizabeth clasped him in a hug. ‘I’ll always love you Liam,’ she told him, head leaning on his chest.’ …just not in the way that you need me to.’ His blue eyes settled on her, less turbulent than before and she heard him whisper something in Greek.  ‘ Αν δεν μπορώ να σε αγαπήσω ως εραστής, θα σ’αγαπάω ως φίλος.’

‘I-I don’t… ’

Liam sighed forlornly, not quite meeting her eyes as he translated. ‘If I can’t love you as a lover, I will love you as a friend.’

‘Oh Liam.’ Elizabeth hugged him tighter, feeling his hands come up to caress her back and they stayed like that for a long moment. Eventually he released her and she felt to loss of warmth from where his arms had been.

‘I should go.’

It wasn’t a question, rather a statement, something they both knew to be true. They had said all they needed to and prolonging their time together would only do more harm than good. Nodding, she released him wiping the moisture that had spilt down her face.

‘You travelled a long way. A-are you sure?’

Liam nodded, settling his hands on hers. ‘There will always be a place for you in Cordonia, should you choose to take it. You told me once to live everyday to the fullest because we only have one chance at life and you wanted make yours mean something. Either way I know you’re going to do amazing things with your life Elizabeth Richmond.’

It was her turn to nod.

Liam paused in the doorway. ‘Do me one last favour? Give Hana and Maxwell a call. They’ll be glad to hear from you. In fact I’m surprised Maxwell hasn’t flown over already.’

Elizabeth nodded, smiling a little at the memory of her friends, Hana’s soft features and Maxwell’s bright smile floating into her head.

‘I will.’

‘Goodbye Elizabeth.’

‘Goodbye Liam.’

With one last glance back at her, the king of Cordonia left her alone in the foyer, wondering if she’d made the same mistake a second time.

–

Tugging nervously at her hair, Elizabeth could not stop herself from fidgeting in her seat as the dial tone echoed through the living room. It had taken her a few days to work up the courage to finally doing it but after sending an impulsive text to Maxwell, she’d been inundated with emojis and gifs and roped into a Skype session. She was contemplating abandoning the entire idea and holing herself up in her room for the rest of the day when-

‘LITTLE BLOSSOM!!’ Maxwell’s face appeared on the screen before the camera seemed to zoom in on his face suddenly. ‘I missed you! I mean we missed you! I’m just so happy I’m could hug you through the laptop. Can’t you feel it Elizabeth? Can you?!’

Elizabeth couldn’t help but laugh at the sight of him actually attempting to hug the device. He was exactly like what she remembered. ‘I feel it Maxwell.’

‘Hey Elizabeth,’ Hana sidled into the frame, a shy smile on her lips. ‘Its good to see you.’

‘Likewise Hana. I’ve missed you two,’ she couldn’t hide the relief in her voice.

‘Don’t forget this little guy!’ A wiggling bundle became visible on the screen. ‘Cooper, look thats your mum. Say hi Cooper!’

‘I have a corgi?’

‘You don’t just have a corgi Elizabeth,’ Maxwell answered looking momentarily horrified. ‘You’ve got the cutest, fluffiest, wiggliest corgi in all of Cordonia!’ He then proceed to shower the dog with a barrage of kisses.

‘How’s New York?’ Hana asked.

‘New York is good… I’ve been spending a lot of time with my family which is nice. Especially since we weren’t on such good terms before. It’s been nice to just relax and reconnect with everyone, almost like I’d never left..’ She trailed off, feeling strangely guilty for admitting that out loud as Hana nodded sympathetically on the screen. ‘How’s Cordonia?’

‘Terrible! Its all doom and gloom here,’ Maxwell wailed. ‘Liam’s been super busy trying to pull the country together with all these boring balls and functions. Bertrand’s been more uptight than ever — he won’t even let me do my famous party trick! I haven’t cut open a champagne bottle in weeks! Elizabeth say you’re coming back soon,’ he pleaded. ‘I need my partner in crime back!’

‘Uhh…’

After Liam’s visit she’d been more confused than ever with memories returning in uncontrollable jumbled waves, leaving her exhausted and bewildered each time they appeared. There seemed to be no chronology to it and every time she attempted to arrange them into some sort of timeline, the effort to focus alone drained her mental energy.

‘She will be back when she’s ready Maxwell,’ Hana put in firmly, noticing her discomfort. ‘And whenever that is we’ll be waiting for her with open arms.’

‘I guess you’re right,’ he agreed. ‘But please don’t take too long Liz, I don’t know how long I can fool the guards into letting me camp out in the airport.’

Elizabeth nodded vaguely, her mind somewhere else as she tried to muster up the courage to ask the question she’d been so apprehensive about.

‘How’s…how’s Drake?’

On screen, Maxwell and Hana exchanged a knowing look before turning back to her.

‘Liz….’ Something in Hana’s voice made her throat constrict a little and immediately she knew something wasn’t right.

‘Hana what happened?’ Elizabeth insisted, her voice shriller as she sat forward in her seat, stomach tangling into tighter knots. Her hands clenched together in anticipation, watching her friend sigh before answering.

‘Elizabeth…’

‘Hana just tell me. I promise I won’t freak out… I just… I just need to know if he’s okay.’

The other woman swallowed thickly, her face crumpling as she spoke. ‘About a week ago Lord Neville challenged Drake to a duel, the first one Cordonia’s had in over a hundred years. Drake was in a bad place before it but he managed to win in the end, but Neville… he hit him hard and after the duel Drake passed out…  They took him to the hospital right after that and the doctors managed to stitch him up but the wound got infected… He’s been in hospital ever since.’

Tears had welled up in Elizabeth’s eyes as her friend related the incident to her. The guilt that had been simmering in the pit of her stomach bubbled over now and she hung her head in her hands. ‘How is he now?’

‘Liz…’ Maxwell’s voice was full of concern and empathy but she ignored him.

‘I asked you a question Hana.’ It was like she was hearing herself talk through a tunnel. ‘How is he now?’

‘They managed to get the infection under control but I-We’ve never seen him this bad before… It takes a hard hit to knock Drake off his feet but… he’s down and it doesn’t look like he’s getting back up any time soon.’

Each word that came out of her friend’s mouth stung like a snap of a whip to her skin. Her feelings towards Drake were… complicated at best from the conflicting memories that fogged up her head but Elizabeth knew one thing: She needed to see him. She’d left in the worst possible way and now if he was hurting, it was her fault. She needed to fix this.

–

‘You’re going where?’

Elizabeth faced her mother in their kitchen, both woman locked in a tense standoff. ‘I told you Amma. I’m going back to Cordonia and nothing you say is going to stop me.’

‘Aishwarya you can’t just up and leave like this!’ Chanaya Richmond eyed her daughter indignantly. ‘இல்லை [No] I refuse. I will not have it. நீ போகவில்லை [You’re not going]. Give me your passport.’

Elizabeth held the document out of her mother’s reach. ‘I don’t care Amma. Its not up to you. I’m going and that’s final.’

Rhea stepped in, having heard her daughter and granddaughter from their living room. ‘Chanaya போதும்! [enough] She’s a grown woman, not a little girl. She can decide for herself.’

‘The last time she decided that she ended up on our doorstep with brain damage Amma. What if they hurt her again? I won’t have my daughter ridiculed and ruined on every newspaper front page! Those Cambodians-‘

‘Cordonians.’

‘எதுவாக [Whatever] They are the reason you got hurt in the first place. And now you want to go back to the same people who let you fall off a cliff?!’

‘Amma ஓய்வெடுக்க —‘

‘Don’t you tell me to relax! You can’t prance off to some foreign country and ask our family to sit back with that knowledge and hold that anger in.’

Elizabeth’s mother whirled back to her, pointing an accusatory finger back at her. ‘Besides how are you going to fly huh? You had brain injury. Did you not hear the doctor Aishwarya? You still get headaches, nausea, fatigue. What if you have a seizure on the plane?!’

‘I’ll be fine,’ Elizabeth argued back stubbornly. ‘I managed on the way here, didn’t I?’

‘You ended up collapsing on our front porch, soaking wet from the rain! You slept for three days after that.’

’Last time was rushed but this time, if it makes you happy I will apply for the disability package,’ she shot back. ‘They have special procedures like optional wheelchair assist. Pre-boarding, skipping lines. Besides the doctor has already cleared me for flying. He’s given me extra medication to prevent seizures and blood coagulation. I’ll be fine Amma,’ her tone was softer now as she approached her mother’s teary form. ‘I’ll be okay I promise.’

‘Aishwarya why do you leave me?’ Chanaya wailed. ‘Don’t you know how much heartache you’ve cost your poor Amma? You got hurt so bad. I can’t see that happening to you again maa [dear].’

‘It will be different this time. I promise.’ Elizabeth soothed, gently embracing her mother. ‘I’ll call you every day I’m there Amma.’

‘Every morning and every night,’ her mother demanded, eyeing her steely.

‘Promise.’

–

‘Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Cordonia International Airport. Please remain seated with your seat belt fastened until the Captain turns off the Fasten Seat Belt sign.’

As the plane taxied to the gate, Elizabeth breathed a huge sigh of relief at the announcement, glad to have survived the long flight without any major incidents. Right now, in her mind, Cordonia represented everything that she had tried and failed to attain. She’d originally come to win the prince’s hand and the queenship and failed. She’d been bestowed the honour of duchess dom and had ultimately failed at executing her duties. She had found someone to marry for love and that had failed too. She’d come here looking for adventure but all she’d found was tragedy. This place had stolen a piece of her, her memories, her time that she wouldn’t be able to get back. It had changed her as a person and she hadn’t decided whether that was a good or bad thing. She was still apprehensive about returning but in her heart she knew it was for the best.

Her mind however had been turning for the entire journey, with thoughts of Drake and what to expect when she went back. Was he okay? Would he be happy to see her? Or would he hate her entirely? Drake and her relationship with him (or lack thereof) was just one of the many things she was feeling that she didn’t know how to process. Perhaps it was the uncertainty of it all that made it worst. What if by some miracle he did want her back? Would she be able to give him what he needed? Or would they just crash and burn like they did the first time? She didn’t know if she was ready for a full on relationship after… The idea of being vulnerable and exposing herself to anyone at this stage seemed too much for Elizabeth to bear.

In the long moments before the sleeping pills kicked in she wondered if this was just another huge mistake and if her mother was right: She shouldn’t have come back in the first place. After hours of ruminating on this, she’d come no closer to obtaining an answer and hesitantly allowing herself to be wheeled to the exit.

Maxwell and Hana welcomed her with open arms as promised and for a long moment the three of them stood locked in a tightly embrace in the middle of the arrival hall.

‘Oh little blossom, I’m so glad you’re back,’ Maxwell’s eyes shined with tears and if Elizabeth didn’t have ones of her own, she would have definitely teased him about it.

‘C’mon,’ Hana urged. ‘Cooper’s waiting outside for you.’

As Elizabeth allowed herself to be lead away by her friends, a small part of the anxiety in her began to unwind. She’d missed the familiarity of it all and she smiled a little at how easy it was to fall into conversation with them again until they were all piled into the limo and speeding out of the parking lot.

‘You must be tired from your flight,’ Hana began sympathetically.

‘Not as much as I thought I’d be actually,’ Elizabeth admitted. ‘I took something and it knocked me out for practically the whole thing. Where are we going again?’

‘We thought you’d need a rest and since its not visiting hours at the hospital yet, we thought you’d like to go back to Atlanta and get some rest..’ her friend trailed off, obviously trying gauging her reaction.

‘That would make sense,’ she replied, trying to cover up her uncertain tone but the tension had already grown.

As Maxwell prattled on about the latest development in his hip-opera, obviously over the moon at her presence, that apprehensive feeling was back, sitting just behind her breastbone in a tight coil.

When they reached the manor of her duchy, Elizabeth glanced up at the broad stone facade and tall towers that seemed to be looming over her in disdain. She felt herself shiver a little unable to shake the feeling off her. Standing here suddenly made everything more real and she knew she couldn’t back out now even if she wanted to. She was here. In Cordonia. And in a few hours she was about to lay eyes on the one man whom everyone assured, loved her most in the world. How had this been her life? Did she know what she was getting into when she came from New York with the Beaumonts that first time? Was this something she could come back to?

At Hana’s instruction, she attempted to take a nap, tossing and turning on the soft downy bed of the master bedroom, sleep evading her as all the previous thoughts plagued her mind again. Was Drake okay? Would he be happy to see her? Or would he hate her entirely? By the time she and Maxwell were pulling up at the hospital in the car, Elizabeth was a bundle of nerves. Suddenly every sensation was just too much and she wanted to shrink away from it all and just run, unable to fathom why it had been a good idea to come back here at all? Her avoidant thought processes were interrupted by Maxwell opening the door for her.

‘You ready?’ A smile graced his features, smaller than it usually was but enough to elicit a hesitant one of her own.

Elizabeth gritted her teeth and nodded, quietly following him down the long pristine white corridors to where Drake’s room. With each step, the coil in her chest tightened and she was just about to turn tail and run when… she saw him.

It was just a quick glance through the viewing mirror of his hospital room but it was enough. He was lying in bed, covers drawn up around his waist, dressed in his familiar white t-shirt, gazing out of the window on the opposite side of the room, clearly unaware of her presence. But it was his expression and entire demeanour that really got to her. Hana was right… Never had she thought she’d see the day when Drake would look so completely and utterly… defeated. He was the first man to win a duel in over a hundred years, or so they told her. By all rights, he should have been celebrating.

Seeing Drake again, with her own two eyes, reminded Elizabeth of how much he meant to her, of how much she still wanted him back. She knew she’d hidden from her memories, blocked them off on purpose in an attempt to silence them, hide them deep inside her, pretend that they’ve never existed but now when she was here and so was he, right her reach, his presence flooding her mind with all the memories she’d recovered. Elizabeth couldn’t stop thinking about the… possibilities each one held, in everything she remembered of him, she’d been happy. A real true happiness that she knew could never be replicated. Maybe if she couldn’t get him back, then maybe they could at least try to be friends? Because she’d rather have him as a best friend, right by her side then face the possibility of losing him forever again.

That last thought was enough to calm her nerves enough to steady herself and prepare to afce the music. Her tension had not gone unnoticed as Maxwell sidled up to her.

‘You okay?’

Elizabeth nodded and before she could lose her nerve, she placed her hand on the doorknob and turned the handle.