is that what you wanted to hear?

a/n: kind of angst? but with a happy ending
summary: after a year apart Magnus and Connor mee again and finally clear things out

“Stace… Is Magnus avoiding me?” Connor sighed and sit next to his sister.

“What are you talking about?” She furrowed her brows in confusion.

“I saw him today.” He confessed. “And I wanted to talk to him but as soon as he saw me he practically ran away. I think he still hates me.” He said.

“I really don’t think he does, Connor. I mean I don’t know exactly what happened between you two because neither of you wants to talk about it but it’s been almost a year since you’re not together and you only came back two days ago. I think he was just shocked to see you. Also, I’m not sure if he even moved on.” Stacy smiled sadly at her brother.

“You don’t know? He really didn’t say anything?” Connor asked hoping Stacy might’ve heard something that would help him with the situation.

“I’m sorry Connor, but it’s almost like he shuts himself down every time we try to talk to him about it.” She admitted.

“I just- I wish I could talk to him.” He groaned. “I miss him, you know?”

“Okay, I didn’t tell you this.” Stacy started sending serious glance at Connor. “But he’s alone for the weekend and when we asked him if he wanted to go out with us he refused because he prefers to stay in this time.” She said looking at Connor expectantly and not even a second later he was heading to the front doors. “Just please, make this right!” She yelled at him before he was gone.

At this point, Connor knew the route to Magnus’ house by heart. He would be able to go there with closed eyes. The countless nights they spent there just talking and just hanging out at first before that something they’ve had turned into something more serious and their hangouts weren’t that innocent anymore.

They had their very first, official date at Magnus’ place. It wasn’t supposed to happen that way but Magnus got sick and Connor decided to make it happen anyway and since Magnus’ parents were out of town anyway, he just couldn’t not to visit the guy he was so whipped about.

And despite the fact they broke up almost a year ago Connor still caught himself multiple times on coming back to the memories involving Magnus and everything they had. Because after all, Connor regretted the decision he made almost every day – especially today after he saw his ex-boyfriend.

And when he was standing right in front of Magnus’ house he almost chickened out and went back. But even though his mind was freaking out his body refused to listen, longing Magnus’ closeness.

So he knocked. And then he waited, anxiously with his heart racing like never before. His palms were getting sweaty as tons of possible scenarios popped into his head. Was it a terrible idea to basically ambush Magnus in his own house when the only thing he wanted was apparently to be left in peace? Probably yes but Connor just had to at least try to make this right. Because he missed this boy so much it almost hurt.

And that’s when he heard footsteps from inside of the house. And just a moment later he saw Magnus’ face and he had to really resist the urge to just wrap his arms around him and never let him go.

“Connor…” Magnus whispered, completely shocked.

“Hi.” Connor sighed and shifted his weight from one leg to another.

“What are you doing here?” Magnus asked looking at Connor like he had just seen a ghost.

“Can we talk?” Connor mumbled.

Magnus was dumbfounded by Connor’s visit he needed a few seconds to collect himself. And after that painfully awkward moment, he swallowed hard and without saying anything just moved aside letting Connor in.

They went straight into Magnus’ bedroom still without saying anything only stealing a few glances and trying to look casual doing it.

“So…” Magnus broke the silence eventually looking everywhere but at Connor. “Why are you here exactly?”

“I missed you,” Connor said before he could even think about it and stop himself. “I’m sorry. I mean I do… miss you.” He scratched the back of his neck. “I just- I hate how we left things.” He admitted.

“You mean how you left me?” Magnus crossed his arms looking Connor straight in the eye.

“Hey, that’s not fair. We talked about it. You said I should take the job. I asked you if you want me to stay.” Connor defended himself.

“Yes, you did. But did you really expect me to ask you to stay? To choose me over something you’re so passionate about and something you were dreaming about?”

“No, I didn’t. But we didn’t have to end it-”

“But we did.” Magnus interrupter Connor. “What are you trying to accomplish here?” He rubbed his forehead.

“I…” Connor started but didn’t know what to say everything he wanted to say. “I was hoping to make this right. I really do miss having you in my life.”

“I can’t do this anymore,” Magnus said, his voice trembling a little. “You can’t expect me to suddenly become your friend.”

“But why not?” Connor asked, his heart breaking all over again.

There was silence again. Nothing but silence before  Magnus couldn’t hide his feelings anymore and he finally let the tears fall.

“Because I still love you!” He yelled. “Is that what you wanted to hear? That I still hadn’t moved on? That for the past year, every single day I was thinking about you? Regretting I didn’t ask you to stay? Because I did! But you were gone and we were done and there was nothing left to say! And I tried to move on I tried to hate you but I just couldn’t. Because I love you. I don’t want to, but I do!” He angrily wiped the tears away. “I still love you.” He repeated so quiet Connor almost didn’t hear it.

“Magnus…” Connor whispered and took a few steps towards Magnus. “Why do you think I’m back a year earlier then I should?” At this point, there were tears in his eyes as well. “I couldn’t live there without you. I’ve never stopped loving you.” He stopped right in front of Magnus and cupped his face. “I love you like crazy. And after all those months apart I only love you more.” He laughed through the tears. “And this time I’m not going anywhere. I promise. So if you’ll be able to forgive I’d really like to try this…” He said leaning his forehead against Magnus’. “us… again.” He closed his eyes.

The first thing he felt was Magnus’ hand cupping his. Then Magnus brought his left hand to his lips and place a gentle kiss on it. And the next thing Connor felt was Magnus’ lips on his own.

He missed this so much. Magnus’ soft lips and his gentle, tender and loving kisses. He still wasn’t sure what that meant but he just couldn’t stop himself from chuckling through the kiss. Then he pulled MAgnus even closer after being deprived of his touch for such long time he just wanted to hold him forever and never again let him go.

“Never leave me again,” Magnus whispered and hide his head in Connor’s chest.

“This time you won’t get rid of me. Never.” Connor assured him and kissed the top of his head. “I love you way too much to make that mistake again.”

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