silent ride

summary: seth confronts his boyfriend about their relationship

They were dating for six years now and no, it wasn’t always perfect. They fought but they also always managed to find a way to work through it. Like when Seth had this horrible crash two years ago and Justin didn’t leave his side for a moment at the hospital or when Justin lost his job and was really struggling and Seth was always there to make him feel better and help him. They were able to overcome everything life threw at them as long as they were together.

So why did it feel like this one stupid thing they fought over could ruin everything they have?

They were in the elevator waiting for it to stop on the right floor. None of them was saying anything and it wasn’t this sweet, comfortable silence. It was weighing on both of them almost driving them crazy. But neither Seth nor Justin knew what to say at this point. And it was sad, really really sad because for the past two months their relationship was only going downhill.

And Seth felt like at this point he was the only who keeps trying. Yes, maybe it was a little selfish to think but it truly looked like Justin just gave up on their relationship which was purely heartbreaking.

“Seth I’m really sorry,” Justin said when they were in Seth’s apartment – the place they both were calling home for the past two and a half years.

“Please.” Seth didn’t let him say more. “Don’t apologize to me unless you truly mean it.” He sighed, visibly tired of all of this.

“What? What are you talking about? Of course, I mean it-”

“No, you don’t!” Seth yelled his hands trembling slightly. “You stopped meaning it a long time ago!”

“That’s not true. C’mon Seth. I love you.” Justin tried to take Seth’s hand but he backed away.

“No J. You don’t anymore,” Seth whispered. “You stood me up for the third time this week. And why?” He stopped and waited for Justin to continue.

“Because Sussane needed help with some stuff,” Justin mumbled.

“Exactly. Because Sussane needed help with some stuff.” Seth repeated and chuckled. “I mean I get it. There was no one else who could help her, right?” He asked, already knowing the answer.

“No, there were other people but she asked for me…” Justin said avoiding Seth’s gaze.

“Ooooh right. She did.” Seth hummed.

“Can you stop it?” Justin asked a little frustrated.

“I’m sorry, stop what?”

“Making me feel like it’s only my fault that our relationship is falling apart!” This time Justin raised his voice.

“You’re kidding me, right? Because I refuse to believe you’re trying to blame me when I’m the only one who still tries! How many times am I supposed to propose a nice dinner just for you to bail on me again? How many time am I supposed to wait here for movie night that was your idea just to get a text that you’ll be home late? Again!? How many times am I supposed to listen to you and your friends talking about some party that you didn’t even bother inviting me to?-”

“You knew exactly what you were signing up for the moment you decided to be with me! I told you it won’t always be easy!”

“Do you think I didn’t know that?! But we were able to work things out before and for the past few months I felt like I’m in a relationship with a rock, not this sweet, charming and loving guy I’ve met six fucking years ago!”

“People change Seth! Maybe it’s time for you to change as well! You can’t always grip to another person like your life depends on it, for fuck’s sake!”

“Huh… So that’s what you really think of me?” Seth shook his head in disbelief.

“You know I didn’t mean that babe.” Justin sighed deeply and sat on the couch hiding his face in his hands. “I’m just so tired of all this fighting.”

Seth knew exactly what his boyfriend meant. Lately, he was feeling like crap. Instead of looking forward to coming home he was dreading this moment because deep down he knew they’ll just fight again and then Justin would sleep in the guest room and he would toss from side to side in their bedroom. And at the end, neither of them would get the sleep they needed to face another argument the next night.

Seth groaned and sat next to Justin on the couch. He decided he was done with fighting, yelling and blaming each other. It has to stop finally.

“I think it’d be for the best if we brake up.” He whispered. “I don’t want to fight anymore.”

“Seth…” Justin really wanted to say something to change Seth’s mind but he didn’t know what to say because he knew that’d be the best for them. “Do you really want this?”

“Of course not.” Seth snorted. “I love you Justin and I will always care about you. But for the past few months, we were fighting nonstop. And I’ve had enough, don’t you?”

“I do.” Justin agreed. “So… that’s it?”

“Yeah, I guess that’s it.” Seth smiled sadly.

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