Disclaimer: All ACoR characters belong to Pixelberry (excluding Désirée/Desi) and I do not claim any ownership of them.
Summary: Caesar is hosting a dinner party with a few of his trusted allies. Months have passed with few signs of progress. Desi is being tested once again to her breaking point. For her to evolve into the person she is meant to be, she must pass this trial. During this time where second guesses herself, Desi needs Antony. And before the night is out Antony would end up doing something that would shock even him.
Desi hadn’t left her room since last night. Her eyes were puffy and red from the tears she cried. She sat on the edge of her bed for she dreaded having to go downstairs. Luckily, she had a few minutes to get ready before she would be called to dinner.
With Caesar hosting a special meal tonight for some of the leading men of the legions. That, of course, means Antony would be coming as well.
“I can’t let him see me like this,” Desi murmured, frantically searching through a bag of cosmetics for anything that can conceal. She decided to wear her hair down today. She thought to herself maybe the change in style and a splash of color added to her face would be enough to disguise the fact her lip was swollen.
Every time Cleopatra angered Caesar he would find a way to take it out on her. And it seemed like Cleopatra was doing that a lot more lately. She was barely around anymore. There were whispers of the queen being seen leaving the villa with different men. It was as if she were taunting him.
Something was different last night; however, it was the first time he struck her. She thought back to when Sabina spoke of Aquila striking her for giving her attention elsewhere. For Caesar, however, his rage grew from the fact that Desi didn’t appear jealous of his time with spent away from her to be with Cleopatra. He wanted her to miss him and when he asked if she did, she replied, “No. I don’t know you well enough yet.” She bit her tongue as she tried to use her wiles against him. She knew if she made him think he had a chance with her, she would be able to ease into his circle without raising suspicion.
Caesar was so used to people telling him what he wanted to hear that he couldn’t accept his advances has yet to win her over too. It happened so quickly; he didn’t realize that he hit her. His ring cutting away at her lip. She kept replaying that moment in her head, but she knew acting too hasty would jeopardize all that she worked for. She was frustrated with herself and with him.
With one more brush of her hair, she exhaled and made her way down the stairs. She smiled sweetly greeting the legates and soldiers who were standing throughout the room waiting for Caesar to call them to the table. Desi chose to sit a few spots down from where Caesar usually sat. She barely wanted to see him, let alone sit anywhere near him. If she had to be there, she needed it to be on her terms.
He was vain in the sense that he preferred to sit in the middle versus the head of the table so he could embellish in the admiration of those all around him.
Cheers erupted as Caesar entered the room. His hand grazed Desi’s shoulders as decided to sit beside her.
“It’s about time you came down,” Caesar asserted as he ran his hand up her thigh under the table. Desi adjusted her chair in attempt to create some distance between them as Caesar commanded the men to take their seats around him.
The room now quiet as Caesar stood up raising his glass before addressing the guests. “Welcome! I am pleased to announce that we are moving forward with our plans regarding the remaining members of the Senate.”
He knew to remain vague with the details of his plans whilst Desi and the servants were about. At this time, Antony walked in and took his seat in the empty chair directly across from Desi.
“Antony! Your timing is impeccable as always. I was just informing every one of our decision to finalize the plans we discussed days earlier.” Antony nodded as he encouraged Caesar to proceed. However, his words soon became muffled, sheer background noise as Antony noticed Desi’s effort to avoid making eye contact with him.
Antony nudged at her leg under the table in trying to get her attention. It worked for a moment as he was able to look at her long enough to exchange a smile, but she did not return it. He knew something was wrong but she wasn’t giving him much to work with. Antony always calculating, noticed a subtle flinch the moment Caesar grabbed her shoulder during certain moments of his speech.
Antony was staring harder than ever now, almost in a daze. He could hear a strong repetitive sound in his ears as he didn’t realize that Caesar was calling his name.
“Antony! Right…Antony?” Caesar repeated as the soldiers all turned towards Antony awaiting his response.
Antony nodded nonchalantly as Caesar continued, “Then Antony is in agreement. We can’t let anyone get in our way or know of our plans. For I am Caesar and no one says ‘No’ to me.” Caesar looks beside down at Desi, abruptly pulling her up by her arm. His grasp was tight enough to leave marks on her arm, the table shaking enough to scatter the silverware and plates across the table. Caesar exclaimed, “Even this former warrior whimpers in front of me and obeys my every command.”
But Caesar was sorely mistaken. While he continued to boast, Desi was eyeing the knife next to his plate. She wanted to strike him down though she felt that would be more humane than he deserved. But looking at Antony, she knew acting on her instincts would compromise everything she built with him. She wasn’t ready to let that go. Antony needed her to be smarter than that and he couldn’t protect her from judgement with everyone watching her every move. This only frustrated her more as she felt hopeless in that moment; a feeling that was foreign to her.
Caesar’s grabbed a fistful of her hair, pulling her close gesturing for her to kiss him. The men began to holler out, “Hail Caesar! Show us, Caesar.”
This was only encouraging his behavior further. Anthony still silent as the cheers around him only intensified the anger building up inside him. She jerked her head to the side at the last-minute forcing Caesar to kiss her ear instead. This infuriated Caesar. He was embarrassed and felt disrespected in front of the soldiers. With the back of his hand, he smacked Desi who fell to the floor. She looked over at Antony before turning away hiding the tears that ran down her face. It was then that he noticed the swelling as the blow smeared the color on her lips.
Antony jumped to his feet shouting, “That’s enough, Caesar!” Antony’s voice was commanding and forceful, quickly silencing the commotion occurring in the room.
Caesar turned his attention back to Antony. “This doesn’t involve you, Antony. It’s best if you know remember your place around me!”
Antony was not afraid of Caesar. Not in the slightest and definitely not today. “Interesting coming from a man who wouldn’t have secured Gaul and what’s left of Rome without his trusty stead. How easily we forget who really leads the legions and appeals to the people.”
The soldiers looked at each other in shock as the tension grew around the table. They knew the hand that fed them and the one that fought not only with them, but beside them too. Antony was right, they would follow his orders into the depths if he asked them to.
Caesar and Antony stood staring at each other before Caesar added, “You will regret this stand against me.”
Antony laughed to himself as he looked around the table. “I’d be curious to see how far you get in executing your plans without my input and the backing of the legions.” He broke his gaze only to look over at Desi who had sat up to her waist partially hesitant on leaving and in disbelief of Anthony’s showmanship towards her.
Antony tone now much softer. “Desi, why don’t you head upstairs. You don’t need to be here for this.” Desi noticed the soldiers who where now looking at her with sympathy now realizing just how hard Caesar hit her. Desi nodded while slowly picking herself up off the ground as two soldiers ran over to assist her. Their hands patting away at her dress as small pieces of meat fell to the floor. She just noticed the fall had caused her plate to spill.
“Thanks,” she spoke softly to the soldiers. She wrapped her hair behind her ears before exiting the room.
A few soldiers followed suit, dismissing themselves from the table waiting for the next set of instructions from Antony.
Caesar stood quietly as you could see a glimpse of regret wash over his face. Desi had been the one of the few constants in his life since she was gifted by Antony. He was really starting to take to her and it bothered him that he may have actually set himself back with her. She’s stood up to him before, she was strong like that, but the way he struck her today, the look on her face, he realized how damaging his power can be. Caesar replied, “Very well. I think we should reconvene in an hour after everyone has had a chance to cool off.”
The soldiers returned to the main hall splitting into small groups where they resumed their previous conversations. Caesar lightly grabbed Antony’s arm as he moved to walk past him. “You know I couldn’t have gotten this far without you.” Antony paused briefly, saying nothing leaving Caesar at the table. Antony passed through the hall and headed up the steps.
Desi’s door was closed, but he had hoped she wouldn’t mind if he stepped in. Antony creaked open the door closing it behind him. Desi lie in bed sitting halfway up, patting the empty spot beside her as she encouraged him to sit. He laid propped up next to her, but deliberately remained above her sheets not wanting her to think he had a different motive for coming to see her.
“I can’t…I guess what I mean to say is…” Desi scrambled as she was trying to find the words to say. Antony placed his finger over her lips and began to speak. “I apologize for not noticing sooner. And for you to have to see my anger,” he sighs, “it’s something that I try to shield from you.”
Desi placed her hand on his cheek, her eyes memorizing his face in this moment. “I would never expect you to stand up for me. Especially to someone whose allegiance means so much to you. I’m able to fight my own battles, but after he hit me yesterday I just didn’t have the strength to do it today too. I’ve been so confused on what to do. I have so many people relying on me and for some reason, you’re the one I worry most about letting down. I shouldn’t care, but I do. I want you to be glad that you chose me. That you trusted me. I guess that’s why I didn’t want you to see me like this.” She pulled her hair back in a bun revealing more bruises scattered along her cheekbones. “Anthony, what you did down there for me, it may not have been your intention to mean as much as it did, but it meant everything. Because you…you are what keeps my world from falling apart.”
She noticed a single tear drop from Antony’s eye. He turned away as he took her hand into his. “As you are to me, Desi. You were always someone who could fend for herself and, because of that, I didn’t worry as much about your time spent here. I would’ve never asked this of you if I knew for a moment he would hurt you. I know you do not favor him, but he isn’t who people say he is. I knew there would be times where you would be placed in danger and I couldn’t protect you, but I never imagined…he would hit you. There are countless ways to assert authority, but not like this and not with you.”
Desi laid his head on her chest as she gently stroked his hair, his breathing slowing down to match hers. Desi added, “What if he decides to retaliate against you for standing up to him as you did?”
Antony inhaled deeply and replied, “If he does then I’ll deal with it.” He pulled her hand to his lips kissing her fingers softly before lowering it once again. “And besides. He knows I’m right and what I spoke was the truth. The reason I made it this far with him was because he knew the company he kept with me. He knows he can rely on me to tell him the truth about everything whether it be a truth that appealed to him or something he despised. So he couldn’t have expected anything different from me today. I would rather him look at me differently than you. You see me as I am. Few actually do. How could I have looked at you again if I hadn’t intervened when I had the opportunity to protect you for once?”
He lifted his head, leaned in, and kissed her softly on her lips mindful of the swelling. She smiled as her tears stopped the first time in days.
“And that smile right there, I’d fight a hundred men if it meant that smile would never fade again.” Antony grabbed the cloth and ice beside him as he placed it over her lip. He held it in place as she rested by his side. Antony didn’t mind playing guard as he knew her feeling safe would allow her to finally catch up on rest. He sat with her until she began to doze off her. He covered her with the blanket and blew out the candle next to her. With a soft voice he whispered, “I am” as he kissed her forehead. And he was proud of her, how could he not be. She looked so peaceful laying there, breathing hard as if it were the first time in weeks that she was able to sleep soundly. He looked back one more time before quietly closing the door behind him.
He had a meeting to run in a few minutes and Caesar expected him to show up by his side. And that’s what he would do, with her sleeping knowing he didn’t leave her side, he could return downstairs with a clear mind.
